Twisted Love

How do I love you
let me count the ways
if I didn't have you I'd be lost
with out your bossing ways.
One nagging moment
in every hour each day
not that I am perfect
but you take the prize.
Two timing tramps
that you call friends
yet their standards lower
with each passing wallet.
Three meals a day
that you end up throwing up
just to keep that figure
that you think you have.
Four legged animal
seems to fit you best
not that your a dog
more like a bitch.
Five million questions
you ask me when I go out
not that miltary interigation
doesn't totaly turn me on.
Six clothes changes
you make before we go out
because people are going to care
if your purse matches your shoes.
Seven days a week you spend
telling your friends how I'm an ass
yet you walk on water
atleast you think you do.
So how do I love you
let me count the ways
not that I give a crap
because now you've gone away.
Good bye my love,
and your ignorant ways
never show your face around here
because I don't return the texts
you leave me seventeen times a day.